Fear

Without question fear is the most debilitating emotion. Regardless of the source for the fear, it is paralyzing. And it impacts every aspect and facet of our life when it emerges. It's like dark - it totally encompasses everything... until the light appears. And like light and dark, faith and fear can never exist together, simultaneously - they are totally antithetical. And as light consumes dark, faith consumes fear.

How does fear emerge? Sometimes simply, like a bad experience and sometimes more obtuse. When, how does an intense dislike move to hate and then on to fear? And is fear always based on experience? Or... can you fear something that you've never experienced? And it is totally impossible to like something you feared? At least I can't see how. Fear can be both rational and irrational. Fear does not have to be logical. Reason rarely plays a part in fear.

Does the mere possibility of the adverse experience cause fear?  Possibly. I do believe that fear is based on loss, or the potentiality for loss - loss of life being the most formidable. I would suspect that the possibility of loss will cause fear to emerge. But I also suspect that much of fear's expectation never occurs. So why do we let fear control us - our thinking and our actions? Probably because one of fear's greatest advantage is the unknown. And too often we humans tend to see/expect the worst.

If we can get beyond the emotions long enough to look at what we are afraid of we often find that either a: it really isn't as fearful as we initially thought or b: we can develop a defense against the threat or develop a strategy to counteract the problem. Obviously the problem is stopping long enough to control the fear rather than allowing fear to control us. And c: we need to consider what it is we have faith in related to the current problem. Faith really is considerably stronger than fear... remember that mustard seed.

My Life!

I realize this may sound puerile (that is another of those fun words to say like oxymoron) but I have a very serious question for you. Whose life are you leading? Is it the one you always thought it would be? Is it one that has taken you on merry but certainly unexpected adventures? Is it one that you can say leaves you with little regret? Or is it one that conforms to someone else's expectations of/for you? One that leaves you less than satisfied? One that has more tears than happiness?

Another way of phrasing this is - when you wake up in the morning, what is your first thought? Do you start your day with a smile or a groan? And if you feel that your life is less than you thought, hoped or wished it would be, what's stopping you from making the changes you need in order to have the life you want? Is the safety of the known, albeit less than satisfactory, to be preferred to the unknown challenge... 'out there'?

The old saying is true - life is too short to waste the time in regret. Life really is for those who are brave enough to embrace it. And lest you make unwarranted conclusions, I would never suggest that you abandon your responsibilities and those in your life for only selfish acts. It isn't necessary to throw the baby out with the bathwater - that accomplishes nothing. But... you can start making adjustments to your life choices that heads you in the direction you want to go.

Far too many people wake up one morning to discover that those hopes and dreams and wishes seem as far away as they were when they first decided on them. If true, then do what you can do to begin becoming all you can be. It is never too late. I know I've written on this topic before and with some of the same emphases - but that's probably because too often people give in and stop dreaming, stop doing what they can to accomplish what they want. I challenge you, as I do myself every morning, to make me count today in ... my life.

Driven to...

There is a wonderful line in one of Susan W. Albert's books that says, "...under certain circumstances, almost anyone can be driven to almost anything." True? Or are you going to attempt to take the moral high ground and state - 'Not me!'? Sadly, it really is all too true. Sure we can say, '... we're only human.' But that really is no excuse. And to be cavalier about this is asking for trouble.

Do you know your blind spots (yes, you can know at least some of them), 'pet peeves' and sore points? Sore points are those comments and/or ideas expressed that hurt, distress, upset you. Typically only those close to us know them, regardless they are 'areas' that can - drive you. Typically the place that you get to when 'driven to' is one that you really don't like since you may do or say something that you wished you hadn't. For me, when I get to that driven place it typically forces me to go back because I need to apologize.

So the issue really is - what to do about those 'driven to' places? How can we control them rather than being controlled by them? I do believe that if we don't recognize and understand our own places then more often than not we will be driven to do almost anything to reduce the impact of what's occurring. None of us handles pain that well. Unfortunately and somewhat understandably typically we react without thinking, almost blindly, to alleviate our condition.

Often it is our 'blind spots' that cause us the greatest problems. Getting blindsided is always extremely uncomfortable because of its unexpectedness. How we react is critical because for some reason, it's these situations that seem to always occur in front of an audience. So, once again we are talking about a character issue. When these types of 'driven to' situations emerge, it is our character that will 'take over'. In hindsight, is this good? bad? or being worked on...

Backup Plan,Timing, et al

In terms of God's plans, I don't think He has backup plans. He has a plan and that's what's in place. However, because He chose to use us as His instruments and also gave us free will, we rarely follow His path to completing the plan in a straight and smooth line. Getting Plan A completed sometimes takes us on a wide and meandering, over hill and dale route.

If time is a factor and we don't have our act together, He will make certain that whatever needs to be done is fulfilled by someone. He simply does not leave people to chance. In terms of our involvement, this is not a one mistake on our part and we will never have the opportunity to be of value in the future. But it also means that we may miss our opportunity in this particular situation.

One thing we need to remind ourselves of is that God's timetable isn't ours. I'm terrible about getting ahead of myself. What I need to do is to be available and aware. What is happening may be a 'warning' of how I need to prepare in order to be available at the time. It would be helpful if I could see the end from the beginning, but I can't and I really hate to be presumptuous. So, when I sense something I need to stop and quiet myself to discover what, if anything, is being asked of me.

Also remember that nothing is really hurried. If we are panicky then we can be certain we're out of sync. We can be assured that the plan is in place and will accomplish what it's set to do. We all have roles to play, we all have assignments but at the end of the current situation, we also need to move on because there will be a new role, a new assignment. There really isn't time to sit back and savor or rerun 'what if's'. Learn from previous assignments, yes. Stay in the past, no.

Black hats

How do you feel when the black hats don't get caught? Personally I get highly irritated. But it is true that the black hats don't always get caught... at least, we don't see how/if they get caught.  It was so much easier 'in days gone by'  knowing who to root for and who to boo. I was raised that right prevailed that the white hats always won and black hats got punished.

Obviously in real life that didn't/doesn't always operate. Then in theaters we started seeing 'anti-heroes'. Totally an oxymoron. You can't always tell who is 'good' or 'bad' even with a scorecard because, just like in real life, the black hats did some 'good' things and the white hats did some 'bad' things. And the merging between the two began taking hold. Actually I've heard many people defend this as more 'true to life'. Not convinced however. Without the 'good' role models children have little to base their actions on.

Why and how we got to this state of affairs is nearly as interesting as the fact of merged black and white. The problem though is, how do we make sense of this merged reality? What can we trust? Who is worthy of respect? And equally important, what do we do if/when we make a mistake in our loyalties? There are no obvious answers. Which is also part of the problem since we typically don't enjoy the hard decisions. But we do need to determine what our standards are and what to do when these standards aren't followed.

All good questions, problems and none easily answered. It can quickly be argued that white hats/black hats never really existed. Maybe. Maybe not. This leads me to the ultimate question regarding this 'subject'. What do you do when faced with conundrums, layered problems, uncharted (for you) areas, etc.? Recognizing that you are an example, a model for at least one other person - how do you handle this responsibility... are you basically a white or a black hat?

Desert

Have you even been in a dry place? Terrible, isn't it! That really wasn't a question... it is terrible. However, it can be profitable, there can be an upside. It's a question of whether or not you are willing to learn from the situation. A dry place is another word for desert. Webster tells us that a desert is a desolate or forbidding area. I think it's the desolation that is the most difficult for us to grapple with.

Honestly, I hate deserts! Perhaps a tad strong. I hate long desert 'visitations', more accurately reflects my feelings. I do love the learnings I get from the experience though. However, I don't always appreciate them until I'm safely out of the desert, am refreshed, and able to consider what's happened and why. A desert is definitely a hostile place and a location one would want to 'escape' from as soon as possible but it's also important to learn all we can from this experience.


I think I always combine desert and struggling. I also associate desert with need - deficiency, lack of resources, lack of companionship, lack. This situation is doubly difficult if you really don't understand how you got into this place or why. Sometimes to extricate oneself it's necessary to ask the 'right' question. Perhaps it isn't a question of the how and why but of the... now what? Once out the how and why questions need asking.

It's probably fairly safe to say that we've all experienced deserts... multiple times. The issue really becomes: how we use those times, those learnings to grow. I learned early on that if I didn't assess what occurred, what I did/didn't do, etc. then I would be doomed to repeat the time in the desert.  If for no other reason, for me that would be sufficient motivation. But our learning must be more than 'how to avoid deserts', it's important that we learn all a desert experience can teach us.

Stumble

Hurts, doesn't it... when you stumble? Stumbling doesn't always mean falling but it does mean coming very, very close to falling. Stumbling can be a warning. Do we heed it? And when I'm talking about stumbling I'm not just taking about physical falling - we can stumble emotionally, spiritually and even intellectually. For some, a stumble will stop them completely. No further movement will occur. But, stumbling can be a check for us - a time to decide how/if to proceed.

The 'almost' fall does take one's breath away. A kind of... "there, but the grace of God go I" reality. Whether you catch yourself or someone comes along and does the catching, the feeling of escape from what could be a bad situation is somewhat euphoric. Actually, we can use the information from a stumble far more effectively then we can from a fall. A fall entails taking care of any injuries that may have occurred before looking at the reason(s) for the fall.
 
How we react to 'stumbles' says a great deal about who we are.Though it should be warning enough, it oft times isn't. I sometimes think that there is a bit of a war in us - pushing the outer limits to see exactly how far we can go without total destruction occuring. For some, a stumble will cause them to stop completely. For others, a stumble will cause a reassessment of what they are doing and how they should proceed. Some people actually ignore stumbling and thus don't take advantage of the positive potential.

Stumbles occur in our lives no matter how much we plan for all eventualities. The unplanned for ones tend to have a more lasting impact. An argument can also be made that the 'type' (the area - emotional, spiritual, intellectual) makes the major difference in how/if we proceed. Some of the stumbles don't have the impact other types do. Perhaps. I still maintain that how we react to stumbles is the major determinant in our own character development and how we react to stumbles.

Strength

We're told that the greatest commandment is to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, strength (Deuteronomy 6:5). But what is strength? Webster defines the word as: the quality or state of being strong, capacity for endurance, power to resist force and attack, a moral force. We can conclude then that this is not just physical strength that being talked about... it's intellectual, emotional, spiritual.

For me, what I found interesting is that when Jesus was asked what the greatest commandment was He quoted from Deuteronomy but did not use the word 'strength' (Matthew 22:37). At least my translation reads that way. I did wonder but simply accepted that 'strength' was implied. And when you look at that description, you see that the commandment does include ALL of you. Trust me, to love according to this definition will require strength.

So, do you consider yourself strong? What threatens your strength? What strengthens your strength? All those questions require answers - they are not rhetorical. Simply ignoring threats to this love will never help. It's how you respond and what you do that strengthens love. Love is never weak. Look at how Paul describes it in 1Corinthians 12. Love is a force and it is all encompassing. But love is always tested.

To love completely, totally is our choice. I realize that there are those who may disagree but I can't comprehend a partial loving. This simply is not possible. Love is one of those either/or words. If we are to love God with all our heart, soul, mind then this will take all our strength. I think Dietrich Bonheoffer said it best, “Salvation is free, but discipleship will cost you your life.”

Just a bit more...

I know we rarely think we have enough (everything) to (fill in the blank) but how much is ... just a bit more? I suspect we really don't have an answer to that either. But whatever the 'it' is that you don't have enough of, we can use it as the basis for doing nothing. Yes, it is a bit of a cop out and before you yell 'foul' because I haven't defined the word, think about this. What stops you from moving ahead? Do you honestly believe that you'll receive whatever it is you think you need so you can move on? And... when? And just as important - whose your benefactor that will supply the missing 'bit'?

Seriously. When you begin a project, do you plan ahead, consider options and alternatives, timeline it out, etc.? Or are you the 'jump in feet first' type? The latter embodies the catch phrase, "if you fail to plan then you plan to fail", even though I don't think the 'jump in' types consciously realize this. Another, equally important, question is - do you begin before everything is in place or do you wait to move ahead?

No value judgment on the 'best' method - but do you know how you proceed, when you proceed? Actually both approaches have pros and cons - but it really is important to know which you choose. The 'just a bit more' type will undoubtedly wait till everything is ready. But if you truly trust that whatever it is you don't have now but will is going to happen, you may venture prior to having all you need. How you view your lack is really the issue.

The last question really needs to be answered first... how critical is the 'little bit'? How important or how detrimental to the success of the project is it? And, if it's critical for success then when and where and how will you receive what you need - who is your provider? A 'just a bit more...' may stop you permanently from proceeding or... you just may get creative about how you can compensate or adjust.

Content and Grateful

You do understand that content and complacent are not the same thing? Complacent, in my world, is something to be avoided at all cost. But have you learned to be content in all situations? I haven't. I do work on this but I'm definitely not there. From a different perspective, do you live your life grateful? Regardless of your circumstances, are you grateful for who you are, who populates your world, where you are on your life's journey? I'm not convinced that we can live contented if we aren't simultaneously grateful.

When I read about Paul's life and all that he encountered and endured and then read his words in Philippians 4:10-13 that he has learned to be content. How?! It really isn't the easiest state to attain. However, in reading on he says (vs 13): "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." That's his bottom line. And it is something which I do strive to imitate. But, not there yet.  

Perhaps the problem is the definition of the word 'content'. I think even Webster has difficulty defining the word. As I said earlier, content is not complacent. Content is an action word not passive. Webster indicates that content means satisfied, pleased, gratified. Perhaps. Content in my world of definitions means accepting the condition as it is now but with the realization that it may not continue. Nor may you want it to. Content is the base from which you start.

As for grateful... this is a strong word and Webster only uses simpering (my interpretation) words to define it: appreciative, pleasing. Yes those do define grateful but it is also so much more. Grateful spills over into all areas of one's life. Just think of all the emotions you can't express if you're grateful and all the emotions that spill out of you that are expressed. Can's in this case are the opposites of the can'ts. Grateful is the foundation for content.

Put off ... Put on ...

Both are important. And, obviously, we have to put off before we can put on. We need to rid ourselves of  our secular/carnal approaches and rid ourselves of past baggage as we become the new. It's important to realize that we are engaged as both subject and actor in becoming the new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17). Colossians 3:8 tells us that we are to put off the old . This fruit is: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleman: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language, lying as we put on the new.

In putting on the new, we need to be aware that the new is more of Him and less of 'I'. That can be difficult. We are so use to being 'in charge' that even when we read and understand who the new man is we still have difficulty in relinquishing our control. It's not impossible, just difficult. And it really isn't a matter of trusting the Lord, it's more a matter of our decisions, our determination, our control. The interesting part in all this is that we still do retain the decisions, control but we have a different standard by which to make those decisions.

Just who and what is the 'new'? First thing we learn is that it is a renewal but it is also a brand new - something that didn't exist before. One of the 'new' is that now we have the fruit of the Spirit operating in our lives: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). The fruit may exist but it is up to us to exercise it. We still are the actor, the subject. It will not manifest if we don't allow it to work.

One of the difficulties in understanding is that we still are the one who chooses to act in a particular fashion. We aren't robots and we will make mistakes. Putting on the new is a process. It takes time and it takes our choosing to learn and grow what the new is and can do. No one will wave a magic wand and suddenly you are all 'good' and safe and happy and nothing bad will happen. We are still in the world. But how we choose to share ourselves and act is still our decision. Put off ... Put on ...

Right place/time?

Do you ever feel that you're in the wrong place? Or maybe you think your timing is off, that you've somehow 'missed it' or that it's for so far in the future that it isn't 'currently' viable? My first words of advice are: Don't Assume! Too often when things are not going as we have planned or thought they should, we think we have misread the information. Perhaps... but not necessarily.

Timing is a tricky thing at best. You don't want to be early but you certainly don't want to be late. I've discovered that if we have misread the time, God always finds a way to make it work (all things work to the good, Romans 8:28)) but He looks at our hearts first. What is our motivation? Are we 'ready'? Have we done the prep work (2Timothy 3:17)? He is not about to place us in a position where we will fail or, worse, hurt those we are trying to help. If we aren't ready, regardless the reason, the work will get done... just not by us.

One thing we do have to recognize is that we will never be totally prepared. However, that reality doesn't absolve us from the responsibility to prepare (2Timothy 2:15). Preparation can be very tedious, but it really depends on our attitude. When we accept the fact that we need to be able to be prepared for any eventuality then we get closer to the place we need to be - being instant in season and out (2Timothy 4:2).

I really believe that if we're not in the right place or if our timing is off, that a new opportunity will present itself. The critical point is not to focus on ourself, not to focus on a 'missed' opportunity but to be watchful and to continue to prepare. God uses people who are available to Him - it just might not be in the way we thought... This is a time not to focus on how or when we will be used of God but to focus on preparing so He can use us.

Opposites

We live lives of opposites. And opposites do co-exist... or do they? For example: can you have faith and still fear? The quick answer is - of course. But not on the same issue, simultaneously. There are many examples of opposites: light - dark, faith - fear, hope - despair are only a few of them. And while we can argue that it depends on the situation as to which feeling prevails, there is a primary position we all have.

The issue can be 'feeling'. While feelings often rule, it is our mind that controls. I suspect that's why we have as many scriptures on renewing the mind that there are. 2Corinthians 4:16 talks about the inward man being renewed day by day, Ephesians 4:23 tells us to be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and Romans 12:2 tells to to be transformed by the renewing of your mind. There are other examples but two things seem to reaffirm that this is not a one time act and that it is progressive. It's important that we renew our minds so that it does control.

But have you considered the opposites that exist in your life? Light - dark. Do you know that it's impossible for dark to coexist with light? The dark is swallowed up in the light. But the opposite, dark swallowing light cannot occur. Dark is the lesser. Light brings understanding, knowledge but dark only brings negative emotions. Faith - fear. Again, it is impossible for them to coexist. Fear is crippling while faith is enabling. Fear brings stress and worry, faith brings assurance. Hope - despair. You can't hope if you live in despair and you can't despair if you live in hope.

All of these opposites are either/or. You can't hold both simultaneously.  None of the 'negative' opposites have power, except that which we give them. All of the 'positive' opposites are imbued with power. Light, faith, hope bring us to a place of peace, a place of strength. Dark, fear, despair bring us to sadness and conflict. And... you choose which you will live with.

The Gift of Rescue

That phrase simply leapt out at me. It was a comment in a Christmas letter that a friend had sent. In it was the statement: God's gift of rescue. Outside of when you are in dire need, do you ever think about rescue? Rescue... is it simply a 'saving from'? Webster defines the word as: to free from confinement, danger, or evil.  Both 'deliver' and 'save' are synonyms. While rescuing is always a saving  from some one/thing, it is also a deliverance into something and 'better' is typically the definition.

The one word that would describe the feelings of the rescuee is relief. Relief that one's status has changed, improved. Relief that whatever danger existed has been defeated or that you have escaped. Soooo, do you need rescuing? And equally important - do you know what you need rescuing from? Are you willing to be rescued? Before you cavalierly state that anyone needing rescuing is by definition willing - not necessarily.

After the relief of rescue wears off then the feelings of knowing you owe a debt to the rescuer begin. How to repay? But what do you do when there is no way to repay? How do you respond to the rescuer? This can become an obstacle between you and the rescuer if you let it. It takes more strength to accept, graciously, the gift you were given of rescue than any 'repayment' could afford. And there are those rescuers who don't expect repayment.

Being rescued can become a wonderful motivator in terms of how we respond to others. A rescued person does tend to become more accepting, more gracious, more loving. You? God, through Jesus, has rescued every one of us who have accepted His gift. Our only 'repayment' is how we respond to Him. It really is quite simple. In responding to Him, follow what His word tells us will please Him.

Another New Year

A Happy New Year to you! I hope that you make 2012 all that you need and want it to be. Whatever else happens will be like frosting on your cake - but it is you who make the cake.

A couple of things... 1- my 'regularity' in writing in the blog may become spastic for awhile. I've finished the book and will need to take time to do the editing. Though spending all my time on that is not gonna happen... I still will be making entries, just not as regular so do check back. If you have read this blog with any sense of consistency then you'll recognize the entries in the book. However, I've also an invitation for you. If you want to provide input to me by reading 7+ of the entries and 'critiquing' them then let me know and I'll let you choose what you might want to read.

2- stay tuned. I've also decided to start a new blog called - "This blog's for you". It has been my contention for a long time that everyone has at least 1 and maybe 2 or 3 'messages' in their heart that they'd like to share with others. This blog is the opportunity. Think about what's in your heart and then I'll let you know on this blog when I'm launching it. Obviously there will be a few 'conditions' for inclusion such as: no swearing, no anti-Christian rhetoric but the only act I'll be doing will be cut and paste. I'll let you know later what this will 'look' like and you can determine for yourself if you want to participate.

However just at this moment of 12:01 am... stop, look around you, and rejoice and celebrate the start of a new year. There's hope and joy and promise and fulfillment and all sorts of great adventures in store for you - embrace them.