Time

It's not how much time you have it's what's in the time that's important. All of us over a certain age have heard that comment many times. It's true... what is in the time you have is the most important determinant. Ergo - what are you doing with your time? Equally important, are you enjoying what you're doing?

We do talk about time in terms of 'spending' (How did you spend your time?), thus something of value. But... do we value time? I suspect we don't think much about it. And when we do, we think in terms of quantity first. We look at days, weeks, months... even years, not moments. If we were to redefine time in terms of smaller units, would we then value it more? Not necessarily.

Immutable facts: 1- we all have a certain amount of time/number of days, 2- none of us knows the exact number of days that composed our time, and 3- we are the primary determiner of what those days will look like. So how does any of that impact on what you do? We need a paradigm shift in our understanding and appreciation of time. Part of that shift is in terms of the units and part is in terms of or definitions. Do not misunderstand - I am not disparaging long-term goals or time-lines that take into account bench marks along the way to accomplishment. None of that is irrelevant. But I am suggesting that we need a view of time that encompasses the shorter view.

Especially in those value ridden aspects such as family, love, living, personal growth, etc. we need to reassess how we are responding to them in the parameter of time. Too often we put off these until a 'better', more convenient time. There may not be a more convenient time - then need to have as much value associated with them as work and play related aspects. A friend response to this issue: "God as planned for those of us who are believers to be His representatives on this earth - to invest our time and energies in doing His will, representing Him and seeking to bless others in is name! this is what causes us to 'enjoy life' - we are blessed when we bless others and demonstrate God's love."

We can't save time - we can only spend it... wisely.

Seek first...2

IF you agree that we should be seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, the next 2 questions that pop to mind are: How? and Does this relate/apply to how you live your life each day? The first question is the easier of the two to answer.

I would suggest that there are a number of ways one can seek. How you choose to seek is both an individual as well as a group 'approach'. Sometimes you need the input from others to stretch and/or refine your thinking. But there are basic 'tools' in seeking regardless of individual or group based. One tool is scripture - you need scripture to understand the what, where, who, and why. Without using scripture as your source you only have opinion, feelings, and your own level of understanding and experience to draw on. Another tool is prayer - asking for guidance and understanding. Studying is the approach you need in order to grow. (2Timothy 3:16)

Does this relate/apply to living your life? Absolutely because it helps you to live life to the fullest. I don't think any of us would settle for a mundane life when we could have more. Why would you go to a banquet and only partake in the first course of a 10 course meal? Silly? It is if you don't grow in who you are and you can't grow without study and prayer. The basic, fundamental reason for study is to live a life that is fruitful and fulfilling and you are limited if you don't understand and appreciate who God is and especially your relationship to Him. Prayer is your direct communication to Him and is as important as study.

Seeking is a full time endeavor that does not get in the way of living but rather enhances it. If you have the opportunity to share with someone else then as iron sharpens iron, this provides a refinement process. The Lord doesn't change in this (Hebrews 13:8) but your relationship does as you begin to understand Him better. Seeking is a journey but it is well worth your time.

Seek first...

I suppose I could just as easily have said - what should you be looking for, but that isn't quite the same. Phrasing it as seeking first places it in a different context, more of a directive. What does this phrase mean to you? If you are a Christian your first thought should be the scripture in Matthew (6:33) when Jesus is telling His disciples to "...seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness..." In considering those 9 words you have to get your head around: seek, kingdom, righteousness - and that isn't the simplest thing to do.

Obviously you need to have an operational definition of each of those words, not just an intellectual one, and then you need to understand why you need to do as the scripture says, and lastly how any of this impacts in your daily life. If you back up a few verses you'll see that Jesus had been talking about that you can't serve God and riches and then He tells us to not worry. Why? Because if we're seeking first then the end of the verse tells us that "...all these things will be added..." Seeking the things first misses the point.

Seek is not a passive word, it isn't merely an intellectual exercise - it's active and means intently looking everywhere, searching to find your 'prize'. And the prize is the kingdom. To understand and appreciate the kingdom of God, we need to go to the source for discovery. We have the manual, Bible, to assist us in our understanding but it will be a lifelong journey of discovery. This is a daily 'activity' rather than something you might consider doing in your spare time. The kingdom encompasses everything so it is a worthy quest. It's important to realize that it is something we can find or Jesus wouldn't have told us to seek it.

In its most basic definition, righteousness means right standing. And in this instance, Jesus is telling us to seek His righteousness. Our righteousness is based in Him and His standing with God and in our faith in Jesus. There are many scriptures that tell us of those who believed, righteousness was accounted to them (Hebrews chapters 11,12). So what do you base your righteousness on? More specifically... what do you seek?

Walking the walk

Matthew 7:21 tells us, "Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven." Wow! Not everyone! I don't know what this says to you, but to me it says that a Christian can't be one who only 'talks the talk', you have to 'walk the walk'. Nowhere does it say it is an easy thing to do, simply that we need to do it.

What does it mean to walk the walk? I suspect we all have our definitions but I think it means that we don't compromise what and who we believe in. Paul talks about being all things to all men in order to convert some, but this does not include denying his beliefs and the person he believed in. Jesus was not someone 'out there', pie in the sky, a philosophical belief only. You don't sneak Jesus in. Jesus was real to Paul and that would be part of the definition - having a relationship with Jesus that touched the here and now. A personal relationship has to be part of walking the walk because what are you sharing if not a relationship? And without a relationship, who are you sharing?

A third component in walking, after not compromising and having a relationship, would be - studying to know, understand, and act on what the Father requires, His will. Fortunately there isn't a long list of things we must do but it is fascinating that they encompass every facet of our lives. We are told in His word by Jesus in Matthew 22:37-39 that we are to love - first God with all our heart, soul, and mind and then our neighbor as our self. Micah 6:8 gives another perspective when we are told that what the Lord requires is that we do justly, love mercy and walk humbly with God.

Focusing on those few behaviors will place us in a position that we are walking the walk. Obviously there are other behaviors that emanate from the words of Matthew and Micah but the Lord has made  it relatively simple for us. He's not setting up a challenge because He wants us to succeed. When we walk the walk then we are a visible example for others. When we walk the talk then we demonstrate that though we aren't perfect, we try.

Transition

I would submit that we go through many different stages, seasons in our lives. The smoothness of moving from one to the next rests on our attitude toward and preparation for transitions. And reading the 'signs' is the first step in transitioning. Attempting to 'hold on' when a season is over is never a healthy sign. You will only be making bad memories and missing the excitement of what is coming.


I've discovered that the new never begins, though it does give us warnings, until the old is finished. The issue is whether or not we accept the end and begin the movement into the new. If something is over then holding on only creates other problems and ends up making what was into something considerably less. Life consists of so much more that simply savoring the good in the moment. Savoring is fine ... for its season and then it's time to discover the next season.

Transitions are never wrenching unless the hold on yesterday is a stranglehold and your fingers have to be pried one by one. Transitions are meant to be bridges from what was into what is coming. They are precursors and they provide time to prepare for the next step. It rarely is the intellect that is holding you back but your emotions will. Emotions know the familiar so they typically want to stay in the comfortable, even when the 'comfortable' really is a mirage.

If you don't utilize the time available in the transition then you find yourself hurled into the next season. The problem with being hurled is that you can just as easily end up flat on your face as you can land on your feet. Regardless, you begin the new season startled... and that's no way to begin something new. We are constantly having to change and move into the unknown. How we face this, what we do in this time is our transition. Smooth? Hurled?

Then - Now

I am fond of saying, 'that was then, this is now'. I do truly believe this but is there more to the phrase than merely the obvious? More important is your view of you, which are you a 'then' person or a 'now'? Does it matter? I think it does. The apparent contradiction in all this for me is that I can be very traditional in my thinking... at least at the beginning, it's a springboard. But it's more - I don't want to throw the baby out with the bathwater and I believe one can build on the 'then' foundation - it isn't always necessary to reinvent the wheel.

Ok - there were a great number of old 'saws' in that paragraph but I've noticed that they can provide direction or information or at least stop me long enough to think through what is the best approach. 'Then' is our history - good and 'bad' - it may or may not impact on 'Now' but if we don't at least consider it then we can find ourselves in a predicament that wasn't necessary. However, then is never now because the conditions, people, learnings have changed and we can't always expect then to be now (good or bad).

Now is a clean sheet - never written on, so what we do writes our now. But simply rushing to put something on the page is foolishness. What is now becomes then and is permanent - you can never change then. However, the newness of now is exciting in the possibilities that it presents. So, how do we face our now? With excitement or with trepidation? Probably a bit of both.

How we react to both then and now defines us. And definition is valueless, it merely defines. Who we are now is a reflection of who we've been. But we are also more than who we were. Are you being who you want to be? If not, what stops you? Why can't you be all that you are? You can stop you. You can allow others to stop you. But you also have options, choices. You have been gifted with the present - choose you in your now. This could be the beginning of a new then.

Passion 2

There are a few themes that I tend to return to often and passion is one of them. One of the reasons I think this happens is because one is always learning more about the particular topic and, more important, how we individually relate to it.  In terms of 'passion', I deeply believe that you have to follow your passion because I think a life void of passion is so... lifeless. Also, you never stop learning about the nuances of your passion and your interaction with it.

My view of passion incorporates my view of relationships - example: I would submit that you can't have a passion for life without having a passion for people. Just like you can't have a passion for people without having a passion for life. The two go hand in hand. But it's also because passion permeates - it touches and enhances other facets of your life. When it comes to interrelationships, your passion for people will define the depth or superficiality of those relationships.

Passion is the spice and flavoring in life. But how do you express your passion(s)? The one inescapable reality about passion is that it has to be expressed - either consciously by you or it will seep out unbidden. But this also identifies you and sets you apart in your uniqueness. We can have a number of people with the same passion, but the individuality comes in the expression.

The question becomes - what are you passionate about? What is it that gives that flavor to your life, what is it that would 'drive' you to share it with others? Simply, because 'flavor' is that important. I would suggest that you probably have more than one passion and that your passions ebb and flow but there is one that really does define you. What stirs you? Where is your passion?

Satisfied

Have you ever looked at your life's 'accomplishments' and feel that you are coming up short? That you missed important opportunities? That you might have done more? or differently?  As you look at your life, are you where you wanted to be by now? Specifically, are you satisfied? 

Satisfied does not mean that you've accomplished all your goals, but that you are where you need to be, want to be. If you are then you are certainly better placed than I. Over the years, as I look back, I've been involved, experienced, and see a most convoluted journey. I'm not complaining, actually I'm a bit amused. I've looked at some of my goals and seen that I discarded them or simply not pursued them. I've seen other goals emerge to take their place. I suspect this is not a new paradigm. But while I may be a bit amused I suspect that I'm also a bit unsatisfied. And you... where are you on the satisfied continuum?

The question is 'satisfaction'. Not complacent. Not contented... satisfied. My answer is a bit of a mixed message. Yours? The major question related to 'satisfied' is - if you aren't satisfied, are you willing to do anything about your current reality in order to be more satisfied? If not, you have no choice but to accept where you are and make peace with this. You may not be satisfied but if you are unwilling to make any changes then... you have to accept.

Satisfied is a somewhat meandering word in that it can come and go, seemingly at its own will. If asked this question on day one you may answer: absolutely. And on day two the answer is... not so much. Plus since satisfied is also a feeling, it can be fickle as you never really know how long it will stay. But satisfied, or the lack, can be a motivator and that's its greatest gift. If you are satisfied then as a motivator it can help you see what you've done and where you need to go. If you aren't satisfied then, as a motivator it can help you see what you've done and where you need to go. Satisfied is a moment in time it is not meant to be a resting place.

Wonderfully and fearfully made...

Do you realize that it is YOU that is being talked about? You have been wonderfully and fearfully made (Psalms 139:14). Do you believe this? And this is not just anyone that's making this declaration, this is God and He's talking about You! He chose to lavish all His grace and favor, His love and caring on You! His choice. He desires only the best for you and provides all that you need. Can you begin to fathom this? He chose. His gifts. For You. What is required from you? That You believe. That You accept. That you act on them.

I realize that comprehending this is difficult and the evidences all around us from other people refute this - but remember the source. This is God, The God of the universe that is talking to You. And these are not idle words - these words are empowering and are meant for You simply because You are loved. Throughout scripture God tells us over and over of His love for us and shows us by His actions. He requires very little in return. But He does have requirements: the main one being that you believe on His Son.

Some prefer to do things 'their way', choose not to accept His gifts, not to act on who they are meant to be because God does give us the free will to choose or reject Him. But His Word promises us He will in no wise reject us when we come. It's like the story of the Prodigal Son. When the son realized his error, repented, and returned to his home, all the joy of the father was there to greet him.

Will You dare to believe? Remember that 'to believe' means that You are ready and willing to act on this because believing is defined in terms of acting.  Like the boy in the Parable, we come with nothing but ourselves and are given all.You have purpose. You have meaning. You belong. You aren't crap. God doesn't make defective people. We are His workmanship created for good works so we have assignments to complete. But in and through Him we are able.

If you weren't you...

who would you want to be? More importantly, what is it about that other person that entices you, or that you admire? Why would you want to be (fill in the blank)? And don't look at the trappings around the person, what is it about them, who they are, what they say/do, etc. that would make you want to be them?

Perhaps the real question is what is it about you that you don't like? Again, I'm talking about you not what surrounds you. Certainly you may want more money or possession but that surrounds you, it isn't the essence of who you are. What I am talking about is the core you - what would you change? And if you know this... why aren't you making the corrections? What are you afraid of?

There is a kind of 'comfort' in the familiar. You know that person (you) - how they react, what they say, how they feel - so you rarely are surprised. But if there is also a sense of unrest or dissatisfaction then what is stopping you from changing? You really have all the power, all the control when it comes to the essential you. Yes, you are affected and influenced by everything around you but ultimately you are the one who determines how you will react - what you will feel and think.

Never accept the excuse/lie that you are only a reactor in life - that you really have no choice. It's your attitude that determines. And no one can dictate who you are... however, you can give away your rights and let others enslave you. You may have no control over outside constraints but you always have the control over your attitude and who you are. Why would you ever want to be anyone but you?!

Brave

Do you think you are brave? Oh not the bravado kind of brave that typically is for show and not for substance. Rather the kind of brave that determines that what can be attained is worth the price of commitment. Because to be brave does require that you be willing to forgo the comfortable, the familiar in order to attain the prize. Do you have that kind of bravery?

Do you have strength? You need strength to be brave. Not necessarily the manly kind of physical strength that is muscle based but the strength that is character based. Bravery is the strength of character that stands up, not defiantly but strongly in the face of threats made to make others cower. Without the strength to stand for what you believe, you really are only a coward. Standing requires that you be willing to undergo ridicule by those who don't understand. Do you have that kind of bravery?

Do you have the will to be brave? Are you willing to sacrifice? This relates to commitment because it takes your will to stand against whatever is attempting to threaten. Sometimes the battle is short and sometimes it seems to come and go - regardless you can't let your commitment waver. To be brave will undoubtedly require sacrifice. Not the martyr or self-serving type of sacrifice for these are primarily for show. More of the stoic, quiet acceptance sacrifice. In the gaining, attaining the prize there is an inevitable change that occurs. To assume there will be no sacrifice is not logical.  Do you have that kind of bravery?
 
It's not easy to be brave. It's possible that you won't succeed in attaining your goal, but that's really secondary. But never assume you don't have the strength of character to be brave. Know too that it's possible that you will be the only one that knows that you've had to be brave. But being brave means no excuses. The problem is that if you aren't brave then you are denying something, someone. If you aren't brave then you are a coward - it is an either/or.

If only...

How many times do we hear this phrase... or utter it ourselves? Most of the time it is uttered with a kind of 'oh woe's me' sigh. It often is the rationale (excuse) we give/hear as to why something did or did not happen. The phrase reminds me of the poem ... for want of a nail... if only. 'If only' provides the comment that we can utter and simply let the phrase trickle off without really saying anything further. I might argue that 'if only' is the opposite side of the coin from 'what if'; the latter is positive and the former... not so much.

If only... what? Why did 'if only' occur should be our first question. Did we not sufficiently analyze the situation to prepare? Where was our own motivation in this situation? If only seems to indicate a lack of commitment in the first place. That we really didn't expect success. Did we expect, for example - failure, so we didn't exert much effort? Maybe the situation was doomed from the start but without doing what we could, did we only hasten its demise?

Though I've used the phrase, down deep I believe it is a cop out. I don't mind providing answers or explanations but I really hate to wimp out and only give an excuse, extremely lame. So why do we say it? Probably because we really don't have an 'acceptable' reason to offer. Unfortunately, often the response to our words is - "So, what are you going to do next?" And now we are back to the first question.

It would seem that the best course of action would be to eliminate this phrase from our conversational repertoire. If we are truly honest with ourselves we failed to adequately plan. We did not do those things necessary to secure success. If we didn't succeed but had done all we knew how to do then our words and actions would be to discover what and why and we would be responding with facts. As it is... we limped into the situation thus leaving ourselves with... if only.

Arrogant? Assured.

Guilty. And your point? Then again, it may be my definition of the word. To me arrogant means a high degree of confidence in... (fill in the blank). It may or may not be in reference to self, I would argue that the highest form of arrogance has little or nothing to do with self. However, I realize that most would follow Webster's definition instead, which relates to 'haughty', overbearing, superiority attitude. And I accept that my definition does not fall in Webster's so I guess I'll have to rescind my initial declaration.

So what does one call a person who is comfortably confident? Perhaps I need to define this as well. A comfortably confident person doesn't need to 'prove' their position, they are open to discussion and differing views, they have substance (evidence) to support their position, they are able to listen and they are able to articulate their position. Assured is the word that describes a person who is comfortably confident.

The two words, arrogant and assured, describe two very different and distinct positions. One is essentially bravado and the other is essentially confident which means that the latter can be misinterpreted, especially by someone who isn't confident in their stand. The 'truth' that I've learned is that one is rarely threatened by a contrary view if one is confident in your own stand and the foundation for it. An opposing view is considered as a way to refine one's stand and not an attack.

Your warnings that you may be moving from assured to arrogant is whether you are listening to the other position, whether you are willing to consider a position other than yours, whether you feel you have to defend your position instead of simply presenting it with its rationale. Becoming arrogant is self defeating because if you really believed what you were saying you'd want others to seriously consider it. Presenting your position in a haughty manner or with a superiority attitude will be off-putting. If your position has value then it doesn't need protecting, it needs presenting.

Clay feet

Whether it's your feet or someone who you esteemed highly, discovering feet of clay is most disheartening. Much of the subsequent reaction is based on: the validity that it is clay, whether or not there is knowledge by the person and an apology or if it's an unknown, and, if acknowledged, whether 'restitution' is made. But how do you make restitution to feelings? The problem is not throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Simply put - everyone has feet of clay because we all make mistakes - deliberately and unknowingly.


Part of the problem is even putting someone on a pedestal in the first place. Pedestals are high and unstable and whoever is on one will eventually fall. And... they may not even be aware they are on a pedestal and/or that they just fell. Or maybe it was a moment of weakness on their part. Or... The same also holds for you, because falling really is inevitable. Surprise seems to be the emotion that's most expressed. The only way anyone becomes aware is when they sense a change in the relationship.

When clay is detected then dealing with this is typically anti productive. Not just 'un', 'anti'. We want the clay footed person to suffer. Be honest... you may not say that but your feelings have been hurt so you want the other person to feel hurt. While this may be understandable, it never works. You need to discover for yourself if the relationship is worth salvaging and, if so, on what basis are you going to develop a new one.

Pedestals are for putting flowers or inanimate objects on - not people. When it's people one always ends up skinning one's nose or knees - it's never a pretty sight. If you become aware that you are doing this or that this is happening to you - stop and talk to the people involved and then, presupposing the relationship is valued, start anew.

Storms

Are you prepared for storms? Are you in one right now? They are inevitable but of equal concern is... what kind of storm? The type and severity of storms varies. Storms are not necessarily devastating - they can clear the atmosphere of the humidity (tension) and bring clarity. 

Obviously they can bring problems. We may not be able to avoid all storms, but we can prepare for them. One of the key elements in preparation is to be aware of what's happening - is a storm brewing? Ignoring a storm is not logical and when the storm warnings are reinforced by others (experts) who see them, then no preparation can equal hardship. If a storm is brewing what kinds of things do you do?

Panicking is not a particularly positive response. Stock up on necessary supplies is one thing that's proactive. To me, the worst storms are those that you didn't prepare for, or they blindsided you. I don't know if one simply doesn't see them coming or don't credit them with the force they would bring. In either case, they were storms and you were forced to wait them out.

Some storms, however, can be unexpected or sudden. These storms are the most difficult to deal with and are those personal storms of loss of a love one, divorce, financial, etc. We all face storms of all types and levels of severity. How they change us, how they help us is the determinant of the future of how we manage storms. Do you let storms teach you? Do you grow through your understanding?

In scripture, one of the more remembered parables is when the disciples were in a boat and a storm came up. They woke Jesus because they were afraid they would perish. (People do tend to turn to Him in a crisis.) What did He do - He calmly spoke to the storm and said, "Peace. Be still." And the storm subsided. I doubt that we have the faith that if we were to speak to our storm and say those words, that they would be heeded. But the characteristic of calm we can emulate. In the face of chaotic reactions, we can smooth the waters through our own behavior of facing the storm calmly.

End of the rope...

Have you been or are you at the end of your rope? If so, then you are now in the realm of the new. Being at the end of your rope is not always a 'bad'. Being at the end means, though, that you've tried everything you know to do but nothing's worked - you're still in the predicament (multiple definitions). So now what? How are you to resolve your unresolvable?

If you've tried 'everything' then you must start looking for unique answers. Or, should you simply give up and admit defeat? Those appear to be your only two responses to such a situation. Obviously there is no guarantee that if you do continue that you'll find your answer, but are you ready to quit? What do you need to do and what can you do - they may not be the same. Analysis has to be your first step if you plan on continuing, even if you've been doing this throughout the process. However, you now have to look for new, perhaps even revolutionary responses.

All of what's been said relates to issues in our lives that we face. But what about our spiritual issues - do the same approaches apply? How do we respond, resolve the seeming unresolvable spiritual questions and issues? Or people 'problems', how do we handle these? Can we apply the natural to the spiritual? Unfortunately we do and that's our greatest mistake! We should be applying the spiritual to the natural. The first thing we should do (the spiritual) is to stop. Stop and then pray. Stop, pray and then read scripture. Stop, pray, read, and listen to what the Spirit is telling you.

I realize that my suggestion may appear simplistic and unrealistic, but it isn't. The spiritual isn't relegated to only Sunday morning - it's to be applied to all of your life, in all aspects of your living. While it may not answer a particular technical question, it may provided you with the creativity you need to resolve it. And it is the only way to resolve people problems/issues. You have the methodology of what to do when you are at the end of your rope. The decision to use it is yours...

Running away...

Have you ever felt like running away from home? 'Home' can be a physical place or it can simply be a state of mind. And there doesn't need to be an 'apparent' reason to escape just an overwhelming desire to be someplace, anyplace else. Perhaps it's the sameness of everything that's getting to you. Maybe you're experiencing a kind of cabin fever of people, place and activities? But whatever the reason, the idea of running away from home holds great appeal. At least the appeal lasts until your logical, sensible, responsible self emerges to control.

You may not even know what you're longing for. If you do, it's considerably easier but even this is not necessary for the feeling to be either in your face or hovering in the recesses of your mind. Sometimes it's a desire to run to something, most of the time it's a desire to be rid of what's happening in your life - or perhaps even to add some excitement, or maybe it's peace. It's almost like you're drowning in s.o.s.o and it's getting more and more difficult to catch your breath.

First and foremost you need to know that the feeling is not unusual and it's not 'bad'. Second you need to accept that you need to deal with the feeling. It will never simply 'go away', it will linger in some way if not dealt with. It's also important to deal with your view of your life. The 'distemper' that occurred is a desire for something new, something different. But for 'different' to occur requires one to change how one looks at things and how once reacts to them - not simply a different 'place'.

Since none of us, typically, actually run away, what can we do - what's available to eliminate or diminish the situation? I don't think there's any one all pervasive answer. What's required is to know what it is you want - that's the beginning. Then you need to decide what is the best path to attain it. Third is if you're willing to pay the price to attain it. And if not, if you're willing to pay the price of no change. Last is actually acting on the first step toward your goal.